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| god... my life sucks... let me fill you in
Yesterday my dad found my notebook and read it. So did my grandmother. Meaning that they read everything thats in there; fan fiction, journal entries, poetry (meaning suicidal poetry and love poems) Therefore, my dad got mad at me and I still haven't heard from my grandmother. My dad slapped me the one time we talked. He also almost hit me with a fucking bible. I mean the guy isnt even religious.. Dumb bastard. Then we ended up not talking to eachother for the rest of the day.
This morning, my mom was trying to get me up at 8 am... I wouldn't get up and I told her to fuck off (I didn't know I said that because I was still mostly asleep). I still wouldn't get up so she goes and calls the fucking police. After like 15 minutes, I went to the bathroom then went downstairs. That's when I saw the police officer. He kept on making me feel like shit and basically blamed a lot of things on me. I told him my life hasn't exaclty been great these past few weeks and he said that he didn't care. I mean what the hell. Would you expect someone that's gone through this shit over the past 3 weeks to have the best behavior? I mean come on. The fucker could have helped but nooooo. He just told us what everyone else has: that we need family counsling. *sigh* As far as I'm concerened people can fuck off. I swear if somthing else goes down I'm out of this place, I swear.
Well to avoid other ramblings, I'm going to go... pCe | | |
| hey just thought id post a poem that I just wrote
I try to close my eyes and go to sleep
Sleep forever and never wake up
Not around to put up with this
Just to be free
And to do whatever I please
But life doesn't work that way
We wish it did
But we have to fight to get some type of relief
Yet some of the strongest fighters never get that
Crumble
Crumble into oblivion
Where they are doomed to live eternity in hell | | |
| YAY! Jess hasn't been talking about Benji in a long time ^_^. No one knows how happy it makes me. I mean..... I don't like the thought of her thinking about the past that much so yeah. It works ^_^. I don't have much to say except that I am now Jeff Hardy addicted. I'm never forgiving Jess. lol. Well I might update later so peace for now. \m/
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| HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEREMIAH!!!!!
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| Hey everyone, the past few days have been really rough on me. I've been missing my gf a lot.. Too much actually. It's like its cripiling me. I can't do anything without thinking of her. She's kinda not been herself lately. I hope she's going to be alright. If somthing ever happened to her, I'd never be the same. I wish I could help her out, but I honestly don't think I can't do anything but be like a support figure. The reason why I made this blog is that she wouldn't know my true feelings atm. Some of the things I might say might hurt her and I don't want that but I need somewhere to vent out ya kno? *sigh* I hate her ex boyfriend. I also hate how she talks about him. It makes me feel fucking insecure. I wish I was strong enought to tell her to stop it but I'm not because I'm too worried that she'll hate me for that and pull a bitch fit. See? I'm a fucking weakling. I wish I wasn't. I want to go back to the way I was. Strong on the outside and no one knew how I felt on the inside.
Well that's all I'm going to ramble about for now. Peace out \m/ | | |
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